Thursday, December 20, 2012

The Legend of the Warrior Amazon Lesbian Hamsters


Now, about the Warrior Amazon Lesbian Hamsters....
My daughter comes home from her first year of college at Reed College. She lived in Chittick, one of the "Cross Canyon" Dorms. They had a deck all along the backside of the dorm that looked out over Reed Lake.
Apparently at Reed, one can have a pet if it will fit in an aquarium.
So, one of her suite-mates B. brought two hamsters to school with her because she had a friend who could NOT take them with her.
They and their friends all loved the little hamsters
They were cute little burly girls and some said they were warriors, some specifically said Amazon and everyone agreed they were lesbians.
Well, my girl gets home one day and she looks in the aquarium and is alarmed and says "B, the hamsters are dead!!!" B looks and says "They're not, they were just fine...they hibernate you know. We don't want to bury them and have them wake up screaming three days later." My daughter buys into this fantasy.
Their friends become concerned as the hamsters certainly look dead and not wanting to have friends that keep dead rodents called for another friend who was pre-med. He comes over and picks them up. Thumps them gently. Listens with a stethoscope and says "Man, your hamsters are dead."
A great wail of anguish goes up and then someone gets the idea to have a Viking funeral for them down at Reed lake.
Some are dispatched to build a funeral barque. Some are dispatched for Schlitz, Some prepare the Viking ceremony, and some get BBQ lighter fluid.
They assemble down by the shore of Reed Lake and tenderly lay their precious charges on the hastily built vessel, douse it with lighter fluid set it at the shore, light the flame and push it off into the lake.
One of the hamsters immediately rolls off into the water.
The other retains its precarious perch and a nutria swims up and sniffs at it then swims away.
About that time one of the campus security guards shows up and wonders why they have set something aflame and afloat in a National Wildlife Preserve.
They explain very quickly about the Warrior Amazon Lesbian Hamsters and the Viking Funeral. The security guard's name was Svenson, so he took a Schlitz and toasted them on their way to Valhalla.

The end



Sunday, November 25, 2012

What I saw Last Night

It's hard to recall too much. Dreams tend to soften around the edges the way a sandcastle does as the waves lap relentlessly and then finally wear it all away.  This one still has a bit of structure and I want to write it down while I can still see some of it in my mind's eye.

I'm driving to school, except I'm going the wrong way on I-30, I'm headed toward downtown rather than away.  I'm not clear where my school is but I head for the Woodall Rogers overpass and traffic slows down and then stops dead.  I can't have this as I have GOT to get to school. It's my job.  Fortunately, my car is small enough that once I step outside, I can pick it up with a bungee cord and carry it with me. I can move, but only at a walking pace.  

I head up toward the elevated loop and I start to notice patches of ice.  That's funny, I don't recall it being cold enough for there to be ice.  I keep walking and notice that there seems to be something wrong with the overpass, I can see that there is a patch missing and that there are bars exposed on one side of the deck.  

Then I see the children.  There are four children hanging from the bars that extend out over a gaping chasm.  They look frightened.  I am terrified of heights but the children are afraid.  I move forward and I see that many people are scurrying around trying to figure out what to do. I ask someone to go for help and someone says that help has been requested.  I look over the edge and can see a dark river swirling down below.  I'm so scared but I tell the children that help is coming--to just hang on.  

They are children though and children are not always cautious.  Two of them hold on tightly to the bars available to them--they are the closest to me.  One child is on the far side of the gap. She holds on tightly.  The child in the middle is a little black girl. She looks about seven or eight. She's wearing a brown popcorn knit sweater and brown leggings.  She doesn't look afraid. She looks bored.  She's not paying very good attention and rolls her eyes when I tell her to hold on.  

I hear over my shoulder that help is coming and I tell the children that it won't be long now--just hold on.  

The little girl in the middle looks restless and starts moving around as if she was on monkey bars.  I ask her to sit down and hold on just a few more minutes but she won't listen.  She swings around and tries to catch the bar with her knees but she misses and for just a moment is suspended in the air. I can see her face.  She doesn't seem afraid as she begins to plummet toward the river below. I can't watch because I know there is no way she can survive the fall.  One of the other girls watches and then begins to cry. 

I can still clearly picture the child. I can see that her hair was pulled back out of her face but was not neatly fixed in the back.  I can see the color of brown that she was wearing.  I can see an expression of placid unconcern in her eyes.  "Whatever."

I'm fuzzy after that, I don't really remember ever getting to school or even what happened other than I went over and over in my mind trying to find some route to school that didn't require an overpass. I've still not figured it out--I'm not sure it's possible.  

I've thought about this a lot today. I wonder if this is my subconscious chiming in on the state of education in the America lately.  I wonder why I saw the black child fall.  

Friday, September 21, 2012

Hallelujah LeahBob

I'm so excited!!! My granddaughter is coming to visit.  I cannot wait to see Miss Leah Elizabeth Ayers.  LeahBob for short.

Virginia and Neil and Leah are coming here from England.  They are coming in time for the State Fair of Texas.  I've never been so much excited about going to the fair.  My folks were not the kind of folks that took children to the fair, so I cannot really recall going to the State Fair with my parents.  I do recall taking my personal children to the Fair, but not so many times, because it is so expensive and we were generally very poor.  I do know that we took our children to the fair when they were coming up.  Last year we went with James and Becca and it was so much fun.

I can't wait to go with Leah.  She will not understand but we will try and take her to the bird show and to the dog races and to the petting zoo.  I want to show my granddaughter the piece of jewelry I made that will be on display at the State Fair.  I want her to see Dallas.  I want to take her to Trammel Crow's Ranch and get a photo of her on the back of a bronze longhorn.  She may not know it but she is half a Texan.






Wednesday, August 29, 2012

The Holy Family

May I paraphrase?  Once upon a time there was this
dude. . .  .

A Duke offered a famous artist a fee for a painting.  It was a reasonable fee.  It was probably an impressive fee. It was 200 figs.  The painter had an idea. He did something strange and wonderful on several levels.

The canvas was round. They call that a "tondo."

There, there in the pyramidal structure was a holy baby, an aged pater familias and maternal unit guilty of heavy and foreshortened limb.

The Duke noticed that there were young nude men frolicking in the background.  He's thinking that he might not be getting good value for his "florin."   He says...."I'll give him 100 figs."

The clerk went back to Michelangelo and says that the Duke is asking for a discount.  Michelangelo says "tell him I want  300. "  The clerk returns and says "my master wants 300.  The Duke offers 200 that was first agreed upon.  The clerk returns and says "my master wants 400."

Today, I looked at The Holy Family with new eyes.

We talked about color.  We talked about iconography.  We talked about burly women.

We talked about shape and color and understanding.

I love art.

Earth without Art is "Eh"


Sunday, August 19, 2012


Mr. Micciche,

I am one of your constituents and someone who voted for you, and a former art teacher in DISD. I have helped in the past to write secondary art curriculum standards in DISD for Art II, III, IV Jewelry, Ceramics, Printmaking, Photography and AP Art History. I am not a stranger to art standards.

I am concerned that the secondary art specialist Laura Sohm spent ten thousand dollars this summer for curriculum planning and as she is a cut and paste artiste I am concerned about how those funds were used. In the past she has used material from Art 21 (PBS) without proper attribution. She has cut and pasted directly from their website into the curriculum planning guides for the secondary art teachers in DISD.

New secondary art teachers in the district are being told to violate copyright laws by Ms. Sohm. The specific copyright belongs to the Disney corporation. Disney has very concrete use regulations. 

Part of the lesson plan states "To do this project, you will need to collect line images of many Disney characters. We recommend gathering these from the internet (or scanning coloring book pages) and creating digital files images sized to print out on 8" by 101/2" paper. These images can be printed out and then xeroxed for multiples as preparation for the project."

My particular issue with this lesson https://naea.digication.com/Spiral/Bureau_of_Misdirection--WORKING is the portion that states "A word of advice or warning: Do NOT make students draw these characters freehand. This a project about the appropriation of the images we encounter into our imaginations and identities, thus it makes sense that the project should be created artistically by using postmodern principles such as appropriation and layering. Instructing students to draw the characters freehand is bad art education because it wastes time and MISTEACHES the way in which such cartoons are actually drawn by professional cartoonists. "

I have 90 hours in art. We are supposed to teach the kids to draw, not to steal images from coloring books.

Ms. Sohm handed out materials this week that included http://www.coloring-pages-kids.com/coloring-pages/disney-coloring-pages/various-disney-coloring-pages/various-disney-coloring-pages-gallery.php coloring book pages to use as a resource for high school art students.

She has some kind of irrational reasoning that this is "postmodern" art instruction. She spouts nonsense that sounds pretty but has no substance. Sadly, there are people at the top who are unwilling to admit that they have no clue what she is saying. The Emperor has NO Clothes. This woman is a fool and she is cheating our students. Our students need art supplies. They should not be asked to make art from trash. I'm sorry, it is a sad excuse for art instruction to print out Disney coloring book pages to create a project for high school art in Dallas ISD.

The new teachers asked about art supplies and were told to go to grocery stores and ask for boxes that were being discarded. Some of the teachers were told they'd get cameras instead of art supplies. 

The kids need pencils and paper and brushes and paint. They could use a lot more, but they shouldn't have to dumpster dive for art class. 

What do you think?

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

An Issue of Forgiveness



I had to ask myself some questions today. Dena Schlosser killed her baby girl 8 years ago. She cut the baby's arms off to free her from some demon (or something like that). There was not a huge amount of discussion about whether or not the woman was insane. She was found not guilty for reason of insanity.  I learned today that she had been released from the state mental hospital in Terrell recently and was spotted working at WalMart.   I remember being so horrified when I heard about the crime, but today I felt so sorry for the woman.  WalMart fired her after Channel 8 made a big deal about it.  I wondered how anyone could even begin to put a life back together after something so heinous and I've got to believe that the hospital wouldn't let her out if they thought she was a danger to anyone.   

Some folks have posted some really vicious statements and I have found myself feeling a big dose of compassion.  I cannot begin to think that I could recover from something like that. I would have checked out long since. 

I'm going to have to think about this some more. 







Wednesday, August 01, 2012

Vaya Con Dios Maude Lebowski, Adios Gore Vidal

July 31, 2012

What a day.

Maude Lebowski died. An apparent heart attack. Gore Vidal died. Complications from pneumonia.  What a weird connection for me to have for this day for the rest of my life.

Maude was born around the end of August 2004. She was a fighter from the get go. We were so lucky to keep her alive at all.  She was a fussy hussy all of her life.

 She was almost 8.

We will miss her.


Friday, May 25, 2012

I've been around the block a few times

I was talking to another teacher about curriculum. Boy, that sounds dry.

In art, it can get VERY exciting. I told her this...."These are the guidelines that we are given from our folks in M*******. They expect that we are professionals who have art degrees and know what we are doing. They do not micromanage. You know, art does not have such strict guidelines. Creativity is our foundation. Our children in our urban area have been shoved into a tube for testing and have been geared for being told exactly what to do. They have a comfort level with that. In art we have to PRY them away from the testing mold and insist that they have creative unique thoughts and THEY ARE TERRIFIED. What WE need to do is nurture and teach technique. Anyone with excessive creative inclination will RUN with that. THEN we can wrap their mind around some of the "out there" stuff that is out there. I've taught art history for 14 years and if they can handle the new ideas they will. It is a small percentage that can deal with that.

The rest of the students that are new to art need to be attracted not repulsed.

Friday, April 13, 2012

It's a Sin to Kill a Mockingbird

I've had a rough week. My husband had to ditch the scooter in the road to keep from being hit by a white haired old lady who didn't notice that there was a big man on a scooter turning left into the post office. He was left bleeding in the median and one of my friends saw him there and stopped to render aid and the ambulance was called and my hard headed man scraped himself off the pavement and went to the post office and mailed books and rode the scooter home. I was not so happy with him and took him to the ER to get xrays. Fortunately nothing is broken and he's just the king of road rash. Ow. He's actually being a much bigger boy than I expected. I've been married to this man 30 years in June. I know his business. I'm really proud of him, he's a champ. We don't take bumps so well after fifty.

Something very special happened today. Right after my first period class I was surrounded by a crowd of young men and one that I teach told me that he needed a huge favor. His friends were surrounding him and I could see that they were frantic. There were five of them and I was somehow presented with a tiny baby mockingbird held in paper towels. They told me that this baby mocking bird was found in the common walkway and they didn't want it to be abused by hateful people walking by.

I found a nesting box immediately and looked up instructions about feeding baby birds almost as immediately. I shredded up newspaper and paper towels. I looked up feeding instructions and found out that it was not legal to keep wild birds. I did learn that I could provide shelter but not keep a wild bird, but could maintain one until I could pass it off to a professional. I got on the phone and called the first rehab number I could find who directed me to a local wildlife rehabilitation center. I looked up instructions online and learned a very lot very quickly. I learned very fast that it is bad to feed water to birdlings and that one should shred a nest and provide a heat source right away.

The baby bird was carried away very quickly toward a vet office and then toward a wildlife rehab location. I am so proud of my students that cared enough for a baby bird that they asked for help. Any human that would expend their time and energy on behalf of a tiny creature is a kind person and I am proud of my kiddos that were concerned for the life of a tiny mockingbird. They have pretty much all read To Kill A Mockingbird and have taken to heart the understanding that mockingbirds are kind of special.

Mockingbird is also the state bird of Texas.




Wednesday, April 04, 2012

My head was spinning

Well, I have to applaud social media. We were all getting updates with the
best possible information. My son in law is a meteorologist for NWS. My
daughter was reading weather feeds from multiple sources and pretty much all
of the students were watching weather feed and we were actively seeking
radar updates. My school is built into a hill and has an extensive view
east into Dallas. We watched a "triangular shaped cloud" track NNW across
the area where my old school (Skyline) sits. They got a bit of roof blown
off and a coach's car got tossed into the fence. We knew when to duck. Our
siren alarms were timely and reasonable. There were folks outside looking
at the wall clouds and dangerous formations. All administrative folks were
totally serious about anything wonky. We sat in a safe hallway for about
half an hour. The kids were really sweet and cooperative and trusting that
if their Big People didn't get too worried that they were probably okay.
They were all texting their friends all over the district and knew that a
tornado had touched down over by the Mesquite Rodeo. We had an opportunity
to discuss our personal experiences with such weather to share our
experience about such threatening conditions. I'm really happy with the way
things worked out. It was about as good as it gets for dealing with
extraordinary circumstances during the school day.

Monday, March 19, 2012

Aunt Mary, I'm proud of my daughter


I don't know if she took after me. Rachael is her own strong person. I think she took after Leah Maxine.
I asked to have her induced on Friday, January 17 and Grandmother and Great-Grandmother were both still alive. Can you imagine how happy both of them would have been to have her born on their birthday? She was three weeks late already. My doctor was in the hospital so I was assigned to the doctor late of Warsaw, Poland. He said that he'd induce me on Monday the 20th. Rachael came mid afternoon on Sunday during a football playoff game. The hospital was deserted. Everyone was watching the game. They tried to send me home but I said I was not going home without a baby. They tried to send me home at 11 am. Rachael was born at 3:12 pm. She was turned the wrong way (posterior -- sunny side up) and she turned around at the end. She fell off the monitor and her heartbeat went away. The nurses thought she'd died. I could hear them talking about preparing for a fetal demise. Mark was holding my hand and they were two feet behind him talking about fetal demise and you should have seen the look on his face and I had to tell him that I could feel her moving that it was okay that she was alive. He believed me. Rachael came out really fast and they put her on the baby tray and she immediately rolled over and almost fell off and hit the floor. So, she rolled over at one minute old.

They took her away really fast to respiratory therapy. She needed some "wringing out" She was considered a "precipatory delivery" and needed some help. We'd dropped off Gin and Becca at Mark's parents at ten thirty. We were supposed to leave them with our neighbors but they were at church since it was Sunday. I got to my room about five and they brought Rachael to us about five thirty and Mark's mother called about ten minutes later and asked when he was going to come pick up Gin and Becca. They wanted to watch the football game and their granddaughters apparently required attention.

That is the kind of family support I had. I said I needed help being a new mother with two toddlers and my mother in law told me that it was MY mother's job to help me. She said that my mother needed to quit her job and fly in to assist me. My mother in law said it wasn't her job to help me. My mother in law was a ballet teacher who worked five hours a week. She lived in the same city but she didn't want to help with her own grandchildren.

My children grew up knowing that the local grandmother didn't want to help them or spend time with them. She spent time with all the other cousins...they all lived with her at some point. She supported her daughters and their children. My children knew that they did not qualify.

It's kind of sad that my children were left out of so much. They lived here and and knew that their cousins got the grandparent attention.

I am so proud of Rachael. She is strong and smart. She is a part of you and me and mom and grandmother and great grandmother. I think she took after all of us.

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Life Goes On

I have such new experiences. I get to teach children with supplies. That's really very nice. What I see are children that have been encouraged to make art. I get to encourage them more. It's so much fun. I have to believe that art teachers have the very best toys. We get to encourage young humans to extend themselves with such joy.....

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Adieu Rylie Lou

As a public school educator in America I have the opportunity to interact with some hard-headed children. I swear, every year I get a "project" or some child that somehow plucks on my heart strings and I usually want to kick them to the back alley and then I get reminded that God has given me an opportunity to share some of my light.

I have one this year and today I learned that he's moving on down the road. NOOOOOOO. I'm not done with him yet. He can draw. This is a kid who has been knocked around and not been parented and he's been in trouble with the law and he is lazy, but has some honor and is just a hot ghetto mess. He can draw. I don't think he knew that. I think that he is astonished on so many levels that he has actually been praised for a good thing.

My nephew is Riley. Riley Louis actually and I've heard my sister call him Riley Lou and so I love this affectionate name and have liberally applied it to this student. I told him that this is something that we call my youngest nephew because we love him and this student doesn't seem to mind that he is called anything with affection.

I fortunately have the opportunity to keep up with Rylie Lou and have already contacted his new art teacher and told her that THIS child might be one that we can pull out of the depths of ignorance and drug abuse and give some glimmer of hope. I know he loves football, but he's not really likely to play pro ball. He can draw and hopefully we can give him a sense of accomplishment that will help him feel worthwhile as he goes forward.

Adieu Rylie Lou, until we meet again.

Wednesday, January 04, 2012

Bacon

Wow, major memory flashback. I love bacon, I always have. When my father was dying at the VA hospital in Memphis we went to visit. They brought him bacon with his breakfast and I admired it. He offered it to me and my mother fussed because I'm sure by that point he was under a hundred pounds. I know now that she wanted him to eat because it would make him stronger. He wanted me to have it because I love bacon. While they fussed over it, I ate it all. I ♥ bacon so much.

I was three years and three months then.